So I have to admit, this whole "boy part" thing is new for me. Don't get me wrong, I get how it works...I just don't "get" how it works, if you know what I mean. Today, Rhys turns to me with his hand fully down his pants, clearly grabbing himself and says "Mommy, my pee-pee hurts." And what's my clever response? "That must mean you're growing, kiddo..." Nice dodge, eh? Especially since we all know that an erect pee-pee is the first sign of growth. Geez, are we sure I even grew up??
So much for me tackling the tough stuff head on... I totally wussed out, and I have no idea why. Maybe it's because I didn't want to have a sit down conversation with a 3 1/2 year-old about the fact that a lot of times guys have, as my male coworker says, BWARs...or something that rhymes with "Donors" Without A Reason. The first time he said that to me I just lost it laughing, but now I know what he's talking about!
For some odd reason I'm just avoiding the whole "Well, honey, see boys often times have little erections..." (Rhys: "What's that mommy?") Well, see it's when your pee-pee feels like it wants to stand up and cheer like as if it's at a football game...." You see where I'm going. It's not that I can't deal with it, it's that it just seems like something my husband should have to tackle instead of me, so I'm punting. In fact, I'm thinking we should just get it all overwith at once and give Rhys and Cole a box of condoms and the birds and bees talk now. Our kids are precocious, why not just get it all out in the open and avoid the awkward stuff later on???
Ok, maybe not, but I swore I wouldn't be one of those parents who found a million reasons to avoid the tough talks--one that tries to rationally explain why their door was mysteriously locked the night before and the TV was blaring CSpan or a Western all night. "Obviously, kids, it was because your dad and I were having an all-night dance party in our room and we fell asleep without turning the TV off." Right, obviously.
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6 comments:
Uh-oh, this is coming for us too, eh? I guess since it's Erin's name in the "father" box of Henry's SSN application, I could make her explain it??? :) In theory I'm all about openness and talking about the things my parents didn't want to talk about. In reality, I'm DREADING those talks!! What's up with that?
Oh yeah, baby...your time will come! I'd highly suggest you get Erin a book and then you go out for the night... ;)
Am still giggling at your saying he's growing...my mom only said that when I got the hiccups (and still does!).
Hey, doesn't this fall within the Mark-realm of "raising boys"? I'm giving you a total all-around avoidance option.
I would like to choose the, "let your friend's older brother explain it to you" option. Isn't that how it is supposed to be? That is how it was done in my day, and I have no hang-ups about this topic that will remain nameless.
...better yet, I will pull out my medical advice which usually consists of, "Walk it off..."
Bren, I totally agree with you. Thank you for that confirmation.
Mark, nice dodge...sorry, mommy still doesn't have a pee-pee.
Geez...so scared of having a boy next time! I know the bare minimum about THAT (in a boy-sort-of-way). I try to think I'll "be cool" about "the talk", but let's be honest, very few people are. But if you're as hippy as your bran and pecan cereal say you are, you should be just fine.
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